that Boy.

       I've written this letter to you a thousand times at a thousand different times in my life. Sometimes it was bitter. Sometimes it was angry and full of disgust. Still always it was written with love and admiration. At times I wrote it because I missed you. Others it was written because I hated you and wanted you to hurt as I did. Mostly I wrote these letters to somehow get the feelings out from inside of me without actually telling someone and admitting how I felt. There were very few times they were actually sent. And the same will go for this one. But this one is different. I write this with no particular feeling of anger or love one way or the other. I have come to the place where I can write it out of indifference. And it's a good place to be. It's not to say that I no longer care, I will always care. But now it doesn't matter. I have moved on and been happier than I was before. You will always have a certain place in my heart and at times, thoughts of you will put a smile on my face that nobody but you would understand. But you are not the one who makes me happy anymore. I will always be grateful for the times we had, the things we shared. Even if I could, I would never go back and change anything that happened between us because I know I am a better person because of it. But the time has changed from when I would lie awake thinking of you at night, hoping you were doing the same. If I see you again someday, I wouldn't be mad, I hope the best for you in your life. I hope that you too have the happiness I know have. 
But for the first time, I'd be okay with saying goodbye...